Fool that I am

(CAUTION: The post of today is rated "MA". Kids - please skip today's post if you find the topic too serious for your reading consumption. I will have more interesting posts another day to tickle you. May the Lord bless you richly.)


I have been told more than once by several people that I am too soft-hearted and too obliging.

It is now past 6 pm on a work day and I am sitting at my chair, realisation dawning on me that there are people out there who will not hesitate to take advantage of my kindness.

I love to teach. It comes naturally to me. I do not find it a waste of my time to coach someone if that person is willing to learn. I once had a tuition student who was very intelligent. However, she expected answers to drop from Heaven.

Over the years, I have had numerous tuition students and I have trained many younger colleagues at work. I realise that a lot depends on the trainee. He/she has to be willing to learn. It must come from within himself/herself. I can nag him/her till I turn blue in the face and the person may not improve if he/she does not have that desire in his/her heart. I do not believe in forcing knowledge upon a person. For myself, I have always taken the attitude that I am interested to learn more. Perhaps that is why I get very excited when I get to handle complicated files that colleagues balk at handling. I must be crazy, eccentric or simply love learning.

There are 2 type of people - those who can see the forest and those who can only see the trees. I have realised that if a person is the sort who can only see the trees, it may not be possible to train him/her to see the forest as it is an inbuilt ability. However, it does not mean that such a person is condemned. The way to get around it is to let him/her handle work that is within his/her ability. Please note that this is a different scenario from one where a person has the ability but not the knowledge. In such a case, I would urge that the person push himself/herself to learn more and to improve his/her skills. The world is big and the sky is the limit. No, let me correct myself. There is no limit. For every mountain that you climb, there will always be a higher mountain. Do you want to strive to improve? Or do you want to remain within stagnant waters?

There comes a point when it is simply not right that I am taken advantage of and I am being made used of (at the expense of the time that I could have spent doing my own work) by someone to coach another person. I am made to attend their meetings. To what purpose? It is not my file and I am certainly not the one who will be doing follow-up work or getting the billing credit. A lot of my time is taken by me to explain and guide. What am I? A tuition centre?

Have you ever had colleagues or friends who seek you out to get information / guidance from you and once they achieve their aim, they run off faster than a speeding bullet, leaving you to wonder what just hit you?

Is this regarding billing? Perhaps. Perhaps not. I know that I am not given billing credit for such files that I am somewhat "involved" and yet "not involved" in. Frankly speaking, such billing is not important to me.

I do not wish to be nit-picky and kick a fuss about small matters. "Do not sweat the small stuff", remember?

Yesterday, I was advised to "put my foot down" and take a stand when I was being taken advantage of. I could not bring myself to do it. Although I whined to my friend about what happened, at the end of the day, I let go.